Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Happy Cinco De Mayo!

Sure, there's a real reason for grabbing the tequila (like my favorite one pictured above) or Mexican beer today. If you don't know what it is, read this. See? I'm here to inform.

Since I'll be working today (thanks to the jerks who won that big Mega Millions jackpot Friday), I'm compiling a list of ways I would celebrate if not for that job thingy.
  1. Drinking tequila until I pass out or throw up.
  2. Drinking Dos Equis until I pass out or throw up (might be difficult since I have a very high beer tolerance).
  3. Watching Novelas because a) I could learn some Spanish and b) the characters are all kinds of crazy even if you don't speak the language.
  4. Whacking a pinata until the candy spills out or I get tired (the latter is more likely to happen).
  5. Going to a park to watch people barbecue and wondering why they couldn't just do that at home. Seriously - I don't get this or people who camp at city parks. Why don't you just pitch a tent in your backyard? Weirdos.
  6. Driving around and doing my best grito. And by "best" I mean the worst you've ever heard. If you don't believe me, give me $100 and I'll prove it.
  7. Driving around and counting vehicles with peoples last names spelled out in big block letters. That's a brown people thing. BTW - saying that doesn't make me racist - just observant.
  8. Watching "Beverly Hills Chihuahua." What screams Mexican pride more than a Mexican dog who lives it up in 90210? Oh, probably that "George Lopez Show." Pass.
  9. Trading my quarters for pesos. Not sure what a roll of US currency will get me, but I bet it's enough to buy chicle!
  10. Walking around The Mercado. It's like Mexico, only the odds of being shot or catching swine flu are significantly lower.
That's all I have for you people. You should be happy to see this post, since I've been a blog slacker lately. I promise to get back on track! Until next time, random readers...
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