Thursday, November 26, 2009

I Love Turkey

I really do.

While I think the President's annual tradition of pardoning a turkey is cute (and a bit silly - I mean, it's not like they're not cooking up a couple of birds in the White House today - read the history of the pardon here), I have never felt the need to hug a turkey. Don't get me wrong, I'll hug a cow, then grab a burger. But turkeys, well, I think of them as mean birds that will peck you. And they're clearly not smart or else they'd find a way to fly the coop. It's best that I win this war.

It does shock me a bit to see that 46 million turkeys are slaughtered just for this big day. Wow. That's a lot of turkey. Before you get all PETA/vegetarian on me and start shouting that birds have feelings and I should respect that, I do. But turkeys are delicious. Can't give 'em up. They should be stronger and faster than people. Then, I'll consider not tossing one in the oven. Ads like this don't make me reconsider my position.

'Grace': PETA's Thanksgiving ad
It just makes me think kids spend too much time on the internet. Google = BAD.

Even though I'll spend my Thanksgiving at work, reheating turkey and the trimmings for my co-workers, I'll be thankful that I'm smarter than turkeys and have a higher place in the food chain. The only thing that could make turkey better is if we wrapped it in bacon. I know, I know. Pigs are smart. But if they were REALLY smart, they'd find a way to not be so tasty. Just like turkeys.

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