Someone, Save Me From Miley Cyrus

For the last two nights, I have had the same strange dream.

I'm sound asleep in a bedroom that looks a lot like this.

Suddenly, I hear pounding, wake up and see Miley Cyrus, pulling on the doors trying to open them. The whole time, she's screaming in her crazy meth voice, "I'm gonna KILL you!" I just sit there in bed, yelling, "Look at you! You're crazy! You're all whored out! What's wrong with you?"

Then, I wake up.

It's so bizarre, I have a hard time falling back to sleep. Sunday night, I wondered why that would happen. Then, I remember I have blogged about the Disney star and said some not nice things.

Exhibit A
Exhibit B
Exhibit C

I could probably go on. But look at her.

She's dancing on a pole. At the Teen Choice Awards. I get that she's growing up and she wants her fans to see that, but there are pre-teen girls who see her grinding on the pole. What kind of example does that set? I'm not a parent, but I certainly wouldn't want my daughter looking up to Miley. 

I understand why Dream Miley is mad at me. What I don't understand is why she wants to kill me. I know people have said meaner things about her. Maybe she's threatening them in their dreams, too. I just know that Dream Miley doesn't scare me. She just confuses me. Kind of like Real Miley.

PS - The only reason I wrote this is because I'm hoping this will bring an end to the dream. If it doesn't work, I'm going to start drinking heavily before bed (again).