Saturday, April 2, 2011

A Blah Month For Movies

There are 26 movies debuting this month. There's only one I'm interested in seeing:

I love Reese Witherspoon and refuse to give up on her (even when she makes the occasional rom-com). I'm totally over Robert Pattinson, so I'll just pretend he's someone else. This movie looks magical. I haven't read the book, but I think I'll wait a few years to do that so it doesn't ruin my movie experience.

Since there are so many bad movies out this month, I decided I'd list the worst five movies and why I won't see them.

  1. Source Code. First of all, I don't love science fiction. Second, the idea of travelling back in time for eight minutes in someone else's body is just plain creepy. 
  2. Hop. Oh, James Marsden and Elizabeth Perkins... I hope the paycheck for this movie was a big one, but this just looks like how my stomach feels when I eat too many Peeps - painful. I know that I'm not the target audience for this movie, but I have as much interest in seeing this as I do a Chipmunk movie (translation: not one bit).
  3. Your Highness. If James Franco wants people to stop thinking he's a stoner, he should stop making stoner movies. Also, Natalie Portman clearly wanted something to make us forget she could actually act. No, thank you. I'd rather remember these two in their Oscar-worthy performances.
  4. Arthur. I actually saw this movie last year. It was called Get Him To The Greek. Jonah Hill sits out this one to let Helen Mirren do the "wrangle the drunk/high Russell Brand" character. Plus, I feel like this movie should have never ever been remade. 
  5. Madea's Big Happy Family. I have always found humor that magnifies a race's stereotype to be racist and unfunny. Why would you want me to think all African American families are like this, Tyler Perry? And every trailer I've seen has made this film appear as if it's a spoof of a few dozen other movies. Is Tyler out of Madea original snaps - or is this supposed to be a spoof? Either way, I say "PFFFT!"
If you want to see a list of the other movies out in April, click here.
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